Boxing Should Enforce Rules Against Slow Brawlers That Can’t Cut The Ring!  

By Jimmy James: 40 years ago, everyone imagined we would wear spacesuits in a colony on Mars. Nobody thought that even though we reached new levels of knowledge, creating gadgets like the iPhone and automated cars, the sport of boxing would produce boxers of the quality of Emanuel Navarrete and Rey Martinez, who use their face as a defensive shell to substitute George Benton’s legendary shoulder roll.

When I head to work, it takes 20 minutes to arrive at my destination because I know and have learned how to cut traffic. Migratory birds fly from South America to Africa and travel on a straight path using the wind to head to their destination. When Cheetahs hunt for prey, they know to cut spaces when gazelles in the savannah run. Cheetahs don’t make excuses or try to change the rules of nature to hunt prey! They don’t cry like Pitbull Cruz because Rayo Valenzuela boxed backwards and beat him.

Some people want to change boxing and turn the sport into the “Hungry Hungry Hippo” game. Yet, some boxers, like Canelo Alvarez and Jose Ramirez, don’t know how to cut the ring effectively and blame the rules of boxing. Are Canelo and Ramirez smarter than migratory birds and wild predators? Humans, generally speaking, have a “higher IQ” than cats and birds.

In the sport of boxing, it is essential that professional boxers at the elite level learn how to cut a boxing ring. In the past few years, the quality of brawlers has dramatically fallen into a style of boxing that has low levels of IQ. If great trainers like Ray Arcel watched the skill levels of Puma Martinez, Joel Casimero, Joe Joyce, and Jaime Munguia, he would spin like a dolphin in his grave. If Emanuel Steward were alive, he would teach Canelo and Cruz basic 101 lessons on how to cut a ring, just as he taught Oliver McCall, Jimmy Paul, and Evander Holyfield, among other great boxers he trained. Stewart would have Eddy Reynoso going back to packing tainted meat again.

One of the greatest boxers to ever cut the ring was Canadian welterweight Jimmy McLarnin, whose foot movement was key to defeating great slippery boxers like Tony Canzoneri and Ray Miller back in the 1920s-30s. It’s already shameful that in 2025, boxers like Pitbull Cruz and Emanuel Navarrete still haven’t learned the basics of boxing, and don’t want to face slippery boxers. Henry Armstrong knew how to cut the ring back in the 1930s, facing runners like Italian-American Tippy Larkin, renowned for his Devin Haney style of boxing. Armstrong was a real alpha male, unlike the others mentioned above who don’t take “slippery challenges” because they are “afraid” of losing: “cough, cough” someone who ran from Demetrius Andrade in three different weight classes and skipped his undisputed championship in 160lbs.

There are a few ways I thought to help slowpoke Rodriguez become more like Speedy Gonzalez: We should chip brawlers with Elon Musk’s neurolink to help them navigate the ring effectively. Another good method would be to attach a GPS-guided system used on ballistic intercontinental missiles to their feet, so they track the movement of the boxers they want to hit without making excuses.

Maybe Athletic boxing commissions should make brawlers wear DBZ’s ¨scouter¨ to locate their target as it moves. Another controversial way to make brawlers move faster would be for the referee to pull out his belt and spank them like a horse on a boogie to boost their speed, forcing slowpoke to cut the ring off faster.

If Gerald McCuellan, John Mugabi, and Wilfredo Gomez, who were pressure boxers, saw Pitbull Cruz and Canelo’s fight against Valenzuela and Scull, they would have spanked them with the WBC belt. It’s shameful that professional boxers who claim to be “world-class” don’t have problems cutting into traffic, but have “serious challenges” going in circles on the ring, hoping for the round to end without throwing a punch.

The athletic boxing commission should enforce a 5-second rule where boxers who walk in the ring are forced to run with the runners and try to walk them down like true professional boxers. That would force the runners (boxers fighting backwards) to fight with brawlers who have to likewise run to catch them. That way, brawlers who don’t know how to cut a “20×20 ring¨ stop walking like lost children in an enchanted forest.

If you want to see a brawl, it’s better to join bare-nuckle fighting and stop winning like a three-year-old about the rules of boxing. Boxing is not a sport for primitive thinking people who never evolved; it’s a sport where brains are required: thus the name, the “sweet science”. Science implies an intelligent life form practicing the sport, and not a group of savage cavemen throwing rocks at each other without brains. I have no problem with boxers who fight backwards and brawlers who move forward, but if you have a problem, I recommend that instead of buying boxing PPVs, you subscribe to the National Geographic channel to watch animalistic behavior.